One of the things that so-called “gay rights activists” never adequately address is the mass confusion it will cause in our society if we can’t make absolute assumptions about the gender of people’s spouses.
For example, consider a man in California named John. John is insured with Kaiser Permanente, which also offers coverage for spouses. Kaiser Permanente knows that John is married, and that John is male. Therefore, something in their automatic systems decided it just made sense to send the above letter to John’s spouse.
Except that John’s spouse is a man named Mark.
Sure, you probably find the above letter very funny, but obviously this is the strongest argument against gay marriage yet!
I mean, none of the other arguments have worked out.
Science has shown that gay people are no worse at being parents, no more likely to be deviant or criminal, no more likely to be abusive, and no more likely to be unhealthy than straight people.
It turns out that our constitution actually isn’t based on the Bible and what certain Christians believe, so all of the “proof” in the world that God hates gay people actually can’t be used as an argument to make gay marriage illegal.
And more and more people are actually realizing that gay people are happy, normal, healthy friends of theirs.
So what is left? Form letters!!
We cannot allow gay marriage in the United States because a bureaucratic nightmare that will ensue if we have to reprogram all of the systems, like the one that generated this letter, that all assume that people are married to people of the opposite sex!
That’s really the best argument …. the only argument… that conservatives really have left.