If you thought Pokemon, the video game/television/trading card phenomenon that galvanized children in the 1990s, was just a fad, you were wrong. The first season of the television show just hit Netflix, immediately after over a million people participated in Twitch Plays Pokemon, a game where people teamed together to coordinate button presses that allowed them all to beat the game as a gigantic hivemind.
Does that sound like collectivism to you?
Something about Pokemon must have encouraged all these gamers to participate in this socialist experiment. If you are able to see things clearly, as I am, you will see that liberalism runs deep throughout the Pokemon universe.
1. Single-Payer Healthcare Isn’t a Disaster in the Pokemon Universe
How is it that any time you go into a Pokecenter, wherein a perky redheaded nurse, always named Joy, heals you and your Pokemon for absolutely no cost? This is because of a liberal invention called a single-payer healthcare system, which is the only possible solution that is worse than Obamacare. Despite the fact that every single person who lives in a country with a single-payer healthcare system will die, Pokemon depicts these Pokecenters as clean, effective healthcare facilities that patch up these adorable pocket monsters quickly and efficiently. SURE.
2. Evolution Is Real, and Observable
One of the first things we learn in the Pokemon universe, regardless of whether you are watching the show or playing the video game, is that Pokemon evolve. Obviously, evolution is a lie from the pit of Hell meant to encourage white people and black people to intermingle in order to make adorable little mocha demon children. Not only does Pokemon tell children that evolution is real, it allows them to encourage it! By “leveling up” their Pokemon, they can take a stupid little Charmander and turn it into a triumphant Charizard, because evolution is awesome and they should totally believe in it.
3. Team Rocket Is Evil, But Not Evil Enough To Have GUNS
Team Rocket, a “criminal” organization operated by Giovanni, the Pokemon universe’s most influential businessman, is incompetent. Like, gets completely dismantled by a precocious ten year old and a yellow mouse incompetent. Their intentions are moral and just like those of the neoconservative movement; to protect the world from devastation and to unite all people within our nation. They would be able to do this easily…if only they embraced their second amendment rights. The liberal propaganda machine behind Pokemon wants you to believe Team Rocket is evil, but not evil enough to use the greatest deliverer of good the world has ever known.
4. Pokemon Destroyed Herman Cain’s Presidential Campaign
For a while, it looked like former Godfather’s Pizza CEO Herman Cain was going to take our country back from Barack Hussein Obama. With his 9-9-9 economic policy that totally made sense and an inspiring stump speech, Cain catapulted up to the top of the polls and seemed poised to be the changemaker Obama promised he would be. That was until Cain began quoting Pokemon: The Movie 2000 on the campaign trail. While his message was appropriate, the source resulted in him being maligned by the corporate media. Pokemon allowed Mitt Romney to receive the nomination, removing all hope for a brighter future.
5. Pokemon Is Against Traditional Family Values
While America may not have its act together, Ukraine certainly does! What does the government in Ukraine have to say about Pokemon? The National Commission for Moral Affairs in Ukraine requested for the television series to be banned, as it is “aimed at the destruction of the family and promotes the use of drugs and other vices”. The show’s three main characters, Ash, Misty, and Brock, all come from abnormal families, or any family where there is not a mother and father present. Ash was raised by a single mother. Misty and Brock, both teenagers, have no parental presence in their life at all; Brock in particular is tasked with being the primary caretaker of his siblings. How dare they not have nuclear families? Shame on those kids. Speaking of Brock…
6. Brock. Barack. COINCIDENCE?
Commonly in anime, while presumptively the characters are of Asian descent, they typically look white. This is true in Pokemon, except for Brock, whose burnt sienna skin clashes against the ivory white skin of the other characters. His name also is suspiciously close to that of Barack Hussein Obama. So much so, in fact, that Google searches for “Brock Obama” will yield an internet meme combining the two.
7. Pokemon X and Y Is FULL of Liberal Ideology
This picture speaks for itself. What more do you really need to know?