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"Reality has a well-known liberal bias." 

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This flying squirrel has a liberal bias!

Liberal Flying Squirrel

“Flying squirrels are hippies, have a well-known liberal bias and are part of the Evil Atheist Conspiracy,” writes Darrell B. Nelson, at Project Savior. We think this is an important and often-overlooked point.

His argument is based on the issue of evolution theory. Over the years, conservatives have mustered a number of stock arguments against evolution, that they can turn out in any conversation at a moment’s notice. Most of these are well-known, for example: “Star fish haven’t changed in billions of years therefore evolution must be completely wrong” or “If everything is evolving why don’t chimps make sassy Broadway musicals yet?”

One of the more fancy arguments against evolution is based on an idea called “irreducible complexity” and goes like this. Evolution happens slowly, in baby-steps.  There are some features that are enormously complex, and if they are only partially-made they won’t work at all. For example, a wing is a very complex thing. Evolution is gradual, so it can’t make an entire complex wing out of nothing in one generation.

But how could evolution ever get to a whole, complex wing if it goes gradually in “baby-steps”? There is no use to half-made wing! Therefore, evolution would never be able to get around to making a full wing… unless there was something intelligent guiding it!!

That argument has been used over and over again by creationists trying to defend conservative principles against the immoral liberalism of evolution.

But there is a problem: flying squirrels.

Flying squirrels have legs with a simple flap of skin that allows them to glide through the air as they jump from tree to tree. They basically have a “half wing”: a very simple thing that is like a partially formed wing. But it is not useless.  It helps them jump farther and faster, both to get food and get away from predators.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU STUPID SQUIRRELS?

WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO TRICK PEOPLE INTO BELIEVING IN EVOLUTION?

The only conclusion is the flying squirrels must be liberals. We have added the appropriate speech bubble in the above picture to signify this fact.

 

 
3 Comments  comments 

3 Responses

  1. nedclark

    …we should ask Mike Huckabee’s advise on the appropriate popcorn-popper for deep-frying an atheist flying squirrel…

    • Max Antonucci

      If only I’d seen this comment yesterday, since Mike Huckabee actually visited my school and I managed to ask him a question. I could’ve talked about the evil army of liberal squirrels coming to conquer us instead of asking about gay marriage.

  2. cowsharky

    Even better, gay liberal flying squirrels.

    Man, wait until the anti-evolutionists learn about Ambulocetus natans!

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