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BREAKING NEWS: The debt ceiling crisis is finally over!

Since everyone is so eager to report breaking news before they actually know any facts, we decided we may as well report on the debt ceiling deal now. After all, we already know what we’ll say… no matter what happens.

Debt Ceiling Choose-Your-Own Adventure!

BREAKING NEWS:
The Debt Ceiling Crisis is Finally Over!

After months of speculation and hand-wringing, the wait is finally over. During this crisis period, markets, consumers, and business owners have all been reacting to the economic uncertainty with fear and anxiety. The American people have looked toward Washington and seen a complete fiasco of incompetence, and a government paralyzed with indecision. So although there are many people who are unhappy with the end results, we can all now finally relax with the knowledge that—at least for a while—the question of how the debt ceiling will be handled has been answered.

TO CONTINUE, ANSWER THIS QUESTION: Was the debt ceiling raised?

 


 

Remember, no matter what ends up happening: you saw it reported here first!

 
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