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Who will George Bush paint next? (with illustrations)

It should come at no surprise that former leader of the free world, turned Christian artist, George W. Bush has once again channeled his godly painting powers. We’ve seen his nude selfies and colorful cat works of painted wonder but now Bush has stepped up his game with an uncanny ability to ham-handily paint world-leader portraits.

This set of painted passion highlights the incredible leaders Mr. Bush had the pleasure of meeting during his presidency; from the Dalai Lama to Vladimir Putin, Mr. Bush has stroked the canvas with unbelievable talent.

But I have a suggestion. Why can’t Mr. Bush take his God-given talent to shine the spotlight on conservative leaders right here at home?  Don’t they deserve the same level of honor and recognition as, for example, Mr. Putin? Through Mr. Bush’s talents we can turn this country around with God, guns, and good-old-fashioned water colors!

Here are three suggestions to inspire Mr. Bush’ conservative canvas crusade, with my interpretation of what his paintings will probably look like:

 

Justice RobeertsChief Justice John Roberts is first on the list for his uncanny ability to fight for our freedom to buy elections. Thanks to Roberts and his four fellow Republican justices, wealthy politically active Americans are no longer limited to donate a petty $123,200 but now can spend as much as they want. Freedom isn’t free and nor are elections.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chuck Gast

Conservative martyr and former Mozilla CEO, Brendan Eich is second on the list for his unashamed commitment to Biblical homophobia. He and his company’s developers made some hefty donations to the anti-gay Proposition 8 campaign, to which LGBT* activists claimed he was violating Mozilla’s inclusion policies. In reality Brendan Eich was defending his religious freedom, making him a martyr for liberty!

 

 

 

 

Mozilla EichMissouri Rep. Chuck Gatschenberger gushes with GOP brilliance as he ignores the 260,000 Missourians who are going without affordable health care and focused on forcing women to wait 3 days before being allowed an abortion. He truly shined as he defended the bill against angry feminzai’s, “I was just considering getting carpeting in my house. That process probably took a month… I wanted to be as informed as possible, and that’s what this bill is, having them get as much information as possible.”

 
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Every single statistic on sex-based pay inequality has LIBERAL BIAS!

Conservatives all know the supposed “gender gap” in income is a myth.  Unfortunately, when we tried to find actual statistics to support this conservative claim… we found that EVERY SINGLE STATISTIC on gender-based inequality somehow supports the liberal view that there really is pay discrimination based on sex. Talk about LIBERAL BIAS!!!

For example, Rep. Lynn Jenkins (R-Kan.) said ”When it comes to employment, the fact is many women seek jobs that provide more flexibility for their family over more money, which is the choice that I made as a young working mom.”

Yet somehow, this graph shows that even when you compare the salaries of men and women who hold the same job titles, there is still an income gap:

Pay gap by job title

And this graph shows that even when you compare the salaries of men and women within the same industry, there is still an income gap:

Gender gap by industry

 

And this graph shows that you can group occupations a different way, and still see an income gap:

Income gap by occupation

And this graph shows that even then you just look at male and female actors being paid million-dollar salaries, there is still an income gap:

Gender inequality in film

And this graph shows that even when you try to account for differences between low-paying jobs and high-paying jobs, there is still a gap:

Wage gap by income level

 

And this graph shows that although some industries show a smaller gap than others, certain industries have an enormous income gap:

Pay gap and proportion of women by industry

And this graph shows that the argument that “women deliberately choose lower-paying jobs” is in part because jobs that are stereotypically viewed as “women’s work” are paid less, which is a different kind of income gap:

Occupational sex segregation and wage inequality

This is just ridiculous!

Maybe women work fewer hours? Nope: Among people working over 50 hours per week, over 50 weeks per year, women’s earnings are 83% of men’s in the same occupation (source).

Maybe women interrupt their careers to have kids? Nope:  Full-time working women who have been out of college for ten years and haven’t had children still make 77 cents on the male dollar. (source)

Statistic after statistic shows that there is absolutely NO SUPPORT for any of the conservative arguments.

HOW IS THAT FAIR?

Obviously, ALL OF THESE GRAPHS are just guilty of deliberate, sinister and conspiratorial liberal bias!!!!

 
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The Definitive Republican Alternative to Obamacare REVEALED!

An artist's depiction of how conservatives write bills in Washington.

An artist’s depiction of how Republican alternatives to Obamacare are written.

Recently, President Barack HUSSEIN Obama announced that his government takeover of America’s healthcare system, the Affordable Care Act, allegedly reached its goal of enrolling over 7 million Americans. The Democrat party is touting this biased statistic as a sign that the law, which takes away your ability to make your own healthcare decisions while enabling women to get abortions in the aisles of dissenting Hobby Lobby stores.

While real conservatives like Paul Ryan and Bobby Jindal have proposed plans, their plans have all been criticized for containing elements that are either not conservative, or are unpopular, or both. I have been able to come up with a complete alternative to Obamacare that is both based on conservative principles and known to poll well with the American people!

My proposal, The Operations, Bandages, Acupuncture, Mammography and Sometimes Ultrasound X-Rays Act, or The OBAMASUX Act for short, is a comprehensive plan that fixes problems with the healthcare system in place before the so-called President had to mess everything up with the ACA’s sweeping shift to a government run system. It is backed up with research and findings from leading respected conservative institutions such as The Heritage Foundation and The Weekly Standard.

It is in absolutely no way similar to the Affordable Care Act, which does absolutely none of the things I am about to mention.

  • OBAMASUX works by providing health insurance to those who cannot afford it by giving them subsidies, which basically means lowering taxes to give people healthcare.
  • OBAMASUX does not regulate your health care decisions, but rather health insurance companies, which would continue to remain private businesses but also encouraged by law to support the public good.
  • Yearly check-ups, immunizations, and routine screenings for diseases will have no out-of-pocket cost, as they have been proven to decrease healthcare costs long-term.
  • Those with insurance through their employer will not have to change plans, as long as they meet minimum coverage standards and their insurance company does not discontinue that plan structure, as they have always done.
  • Rather than gutting Medicare or Medicaid, OBAMASUX expands these popular programs, allowing more elderly and lower-income families to receive medical services.
  • Businesses with over 100 full-time employees will be strongly encouraged to provide health insurance to those employees.
  • Young people under the age of 26 will be able to stay on their parents’ insurance plans.

All of these elements would take the world’s greatest healthcare system and carry it into a bright, prosperous future. Barack Hussein Obama knows this, and with the help of conservative patriots like you, we can force him to repeal Obamacare and enact these reforms.

 

 
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