Liberals hate the rich because they want to fornicate with hipsters #ugh

Homeless Obama fan

“I am poor, I wish to remain poor, and I strongly believe that everyone should be poor.” How often do we hear that from liberals? Or, at least interpret these words when we look deep into their eyes?

A recent Assmussen™ poll suggests that members of the productive class in America are subjected to such liberal, communist propaganda throughout roughly 89% of their day via white noise, direct contact with the liberal or powerful self-conviction. (source: Sean Hannity keynote speech at some Jewish kid’s 13th birthday party that for reasons I can’t discuss I attended and I did NOT ask to see his penis out of sheer desire to be closer to Christ who was also circumcised ugh I got into so much trouble lol.)

We, as rich Americans either by birth or by industry, are subjected to a venomous tide of hatred, directed at us by a low element in our society which we loosely refer to as “those lazy, filthy poors” but also of course includes moderately successful, non-homeless – EVEN WHITE (?!) people who vote for Democrats. These people can afford food, yoga and electricity and can go on vacations, but still wish nothing but poverty on all Americans… why? WHY?

Because it suits their ideals of whimsy and irony. For all democrats are hipsters at heart.

omg I’m totally on a literary roll here and just had an epif:

Democrats all long for the aesthetic of the hipster and the sex of the hipster. They all long to be the pseudo-gay artists living in the lower east side in the 1980’s, they all long to have AIDS and dance around naked with the poors as they give them charity and feel great about themselves. They all long to wear ironic plaid and cheap looking glasses but they all forget that the hipster’s glasses are designer-made to look cheap, and cost a fortune. And with their designer glasses on they drive their cars that run on oil stolen by the American soldiers they love to hate all the way to their local Occupy Wall Street to throw mud at the faces of rich people who just want to make money, ignore everyone and be left alone. #Ugh.

So the liberal tries to look like a hipster, to smell like a hipster and to fornicate like a hipster while the rest of the world has no food, and it deals with its guilt by hating useful rich people like US.

If you have ever asked yourself what goes on in the mind of a liberal? Why do liberals hate the rich so much?

This is the answer: hipster fornication.

The fight to defend upper-middle class young white males!

Who has individual insurance plans?

Who has individual insurance plans?A very interesting article appeared today on ProjectMillenial.org, explaining why it is critical for the GOP to stand up for the rights of a terribly down-trodden group in our society: upper-middle-class and upper-class young white males.

First, let’s examine what this graph tells us. This shows the number of single, childless adults who are in the individual health insurance market, divided into three broad age groups: 19-25, 26-30, and 31-35.  These groups are important, because it has long been known that the people who will see the biggest increases in their rates under the Dreaded Obamacare are young (19-25 year old) males.

This is part of a very well-known phenomenon: “Obama’s war on bros“. Over and over again, good conservatives have pointed out that 25 year old men will bear the brunt of the Obamacare rate increases.

If you are paying very close attention, you might ask this question: “Where does “upper-middle-class” enter the picture? Isn’t Obamacare a war on all young people?”

 

Well, not really.  This is where the red bars in the above graph come into play.  The differently-colored bars indicate different income levels, and the red bars represent those people who have income that is low enough that they qualify for government assistance under the terms of Obamacare.

As you can see, it  turns out that most young people who are part of the individual health insurance market also quality for government assistance, because they make less than 138% of the Federal Poverty Line (FPL), which is the cut-off for people in this group to receive the Medicaid Expansion proposed as part of the Obamacare package.

Of course, everyone knows good conservatives hate government assistance, and hate Medicaid in particular. So much so, in fact, that almost all of the good conservative states have opted to not implement the Medicaid expansion (PDF).

Which means that these conservative states could shield these young people from the dreaded Obamacare Rate Increases, simply by implementing the Medicaid expansion portion of the Obamacare package…

 

“…..but, you know what?,” Republican Governors across the country have said, “We’re not gonna do that.”

 

Because in the end, the amount that we hate “government assistance” far outweighs the amount that we care about poor young people.  (After all, most of them aren’t even white!!)

 

So, in conclusion: Republicans really, really care about the terrible burden that Obamacare will create for young, non-poor white guys. This will make a great rallying cry for 2014.

…..now if only young people cared about Republicans, in return, it could be the start of a great relationship!

 

graph data source: 2011 United States Census data
graph found via: ProjectMillenial.org

Paul Ryan’s tax rates missed the memo on messaging

Paul Ryan loves you

Paul Ryan loves youPaul Ryan’s budget is much more effective when it is not encumbered by actual numbers, which have a liberal bias. This graph is a perfect illustration of this fact.

When Paul Ryan’s budget is described only using words, it is completely in line with the message the Republican Party is trying to send:

EXAMPLE 1: It will “simplify the tax code to make it fairer to American families and businesses” (page 19).  When he says “fairer” he naturally means that poor people need to pay more. Because the biggest problem with our economic system is that people making $10,000 per year have it too easy.

EXAMPLE 2: It will “reduce the amount of time and resources necessary to comply with tax laws” (page 24). This means getting rid of special conditions and confusing loopholes. Are you worried because you aren’t sure whether you qualify for Earned Income Credit?  Under Ryan’s plan, you will be relieved of this unneeded anxiety… the answer will just be “no”.

It all sounds very good when described this way.

Unfortunately, when you “run the numbers”, as liberals like to say, and create a graph out of it, the result is the unseemly appearance that Republicans are the party of the rich.

 

Obviously, the fault must be with the numbers.  It’s yet another examples of numbers having a liberal bias!

 

graph data source: Center on Budget and Policy Priorities
graph found via: Daily Kos