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TODAY'S TOP STORY!

ISIS and Ebola: the real consequences of raising taxes on the rich

Obama has raised taxes. Everybody knows it. Obama was elected, he waived his magic Liberalism Wand, sign an executive order or two, and now everyone is paying way too much in taxes. Not just everyone: YOU.  You are paying too much in taxes, and it’s Obama’s fault.

Consider the following graph of the highest and lowest marginal income tax rates over the last 100+ years. Because this graph has liberal bias, it seems to show that tax rates increase for the rich and not for the poor. But still, rich people matter.  A LOT. Therefore, this graph basically proves that taxes have been raised on everyone… or at least, everyone who matters.

Historical marginal tax rates on the rich and the poor.

In case you find the above graph a bit overwhelming or confusing (who wouldn’t?) we have simplified it for you in the following way:

HELP OBAMA RAISED MY TAXES!!!!

BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE!  Not only has income tax on the super-rich increased, but capital gains tax (the other type of tax that most rich people pay) has also increased!!  All you need to do is look at the illustrated graph below to see how sad this is:

All the taxes on the rich people have gone up and that makes them really sad

What have we seen as the negative result of this increase?  ISIS and Ebola.  Now, I know that some people, for example the head adviser and chief of staff for Ted Cruz, have tried to blame Ebola on Obamacare:

Advisor to Ted Cruz blames ebola on Obamacare

But that’s just ignorant. Clearly, both ISIS and Ebola are part of the LARGER PATTERN in our economy, namely: the fact that the rich are paying a little bit more lately.

Did we have ISIS before taxes on the top 1% were raised? NO!

Did we have Ebola before taxes on the top 1% were raised? NO!

I rest my case. If anybody tries to tell you otherwise, the only appropriate response is to yell LIBERAL BIAS!!!!

 

 
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Republicans Celebrate Massive Gains in 2014 Midterms

Less than two weeks before Election Day, Republicans across America are celebrating their massive gains in the 2014 midterms! Ted Cruz is already demanding that “lame duck” Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid relinquish his responsibilities two months early and give Koch Industries full control over the Senate until Koch’s Executive Director of Filibustering Mitch McConnell

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GOP: “Please help make Obamacare fail so we don’t look like idiots!”

Conservatives! Gird up your loins. We’ve reached Defcon 1 and that sound you hear is Ronald Reagan’s legacy dying! But with your help we can turn this ship around before it runs aground on the rocks of public health and fiscal sanity. Recently, the liberal media has been cranking out positive Obamacare news items… and

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EXPOSED AND EXPLAINED: The Republican 5-Point Plan

John Boehner took 16 minutes to explain his “5 point plan” to save the Universe… I mean, America. Luckily, Zach Heltzel can explain it in only four. It really is quite simple. Republicans want no spending, no lawsuits, no taxes, no mean regulations, no spending, and they want to use Federal money to pay for

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The Christian solution to Ebola is not what you think

Blessed Sunday, everyone! Today’s letter is about the top news story today, Ebola, but my answer to today’s question might surprise you! Dear Pastor Gregory, You’ve heard the news: Ebola is spreading like wildfire and it’s all President Obama’s fault! Great Christian leaders like Pat Robertson and yourself always say that we should just stay

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2014 Texas Governor’s race teaches us what REALLY matters to the GOP

Republicans are obsessed with messaging. They are not nearly as obsessed with actual policy and legislation. You can see a perfect example of this in Texas politics right now, in the race for Texas Governor between Republican Greg Abbott and Democrat Wendy Davis. Recently, Republicans have been outraged by a campaign commercial from Wendy “Abortion

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Republican cuts kill…. and they are supposed to. That’s capitalism.

Liberals and Democrats have been slamming Republicans for cutting medical research funding, blocking the appointment of a Surgeon General, and cutting money to hospitals…. only to “suddenly” turn around and start demanding money and medical oversight now that we have a problem with The Ebola. Some Democrats are calling the Republican Party experts in “closing

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Leif Erikson Day: an EVEN BETTER holiday for gun-toting racist conservatives!

Liberals like to mope around about how Christopher Columbus was a racist mass murderer, blah blah blah and all that noise. But it turns out this time they may have a point: Why celebrate some Spanish puss when you can celebrate a VIKING! He’s rugged! He’s manly! He has a beard like the Duck Dynasty

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Republicans are super-flexible. Here are 3 specific examples.

Republicans get a bad rap in the press. Liberals accuse them of being rigid, closed-minded and inflexible. Ha! Nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, as every “lifelong Republican” knows, being a member of the GOP requires you to constantly re-evaluate your positions, and even your “core” beliefs. It’s exciting! And it demonstrates

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A BIG BAD LIST: 25 things that Ebola is like!

This picture proves that Ebola is like Mickey Mouse. Of course, everyone has already been talking about the fact that the responsible reporters at CNN think Ebola is like ISIS: But this is really only the beginning. Since Ebola has (obviously) been the only important topic in the entire world for the last week or

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GOVERNMENT COVERUP: the real truth about the New American Plague

There are some terrifying secrets about this new virus that has hit the United States. Some people call it the “New American Plague.” Government officials are trying to downplay the danger, but you deserve to know the truth. In this chilling expose based on detailed online research, Zach reveals some of the scariest facts that

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What does God want us to do about ISIS? TAKE THIS QUIZ TO FIND OUT.

If you are a Christian and a conservative, you might be going through an inner struggle right now. The situation with ISIS can be very confusing for a person of faith. As a Christian pastor I am inspired by God, anything and everything I say and do is in line with God’s will: that’s what

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Celebrating the glorious success of the GOP Government Shutdown!

October 1st marked the one-year anniversary of the hugely successful GOP shutdown of the US government. And Republicans have every reason to celebrate. Led by Cuban-Canadian renegade Ted Cruz, the shutdown allowed Republicans to deliver what one expert described as “a sharp kick to Uncle Sam’s balls and every American’s pocketbook.” This “completely self-inflicted economic

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Domestic US oil production has a liberal bias!

Oil. Black gold. Liquid prosperity. Conservatives know that oil is better than anything else in the earth, including water. As a result, Republicans have been working tirelessly to convince the world’s weakest iron-fisted dictator, Barack Obama, to authorize the Keystone XL pipeline and allow that sweet Canadian happiness to flow to the Gulf of Mexico,

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How to discredit the People’s Climate March and prove climate change is a lie

We had reporters on the ground at the People’s Climate March in New York City, and reveal our exclusive footage of the protesters that ABSOLUTELY PROVES that global warming is a hoax, climate change is a myth, and all environmentalists are wrong about everything. How could footage of an environmentalist rally prove all of these

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