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Sarah Palin’s brain damage and guaranteed 2016 presidential run

This past weekend, a video of Sarah Palin giving a speech started making its rounds on the internet, starting out on Crooks and Liars and eventually spreading to several other websites. Sarah Palin is known for giving speeches unburdened by grammatical limitations, but this excerpt seems extreme even for her.  You can watch the video or read the transcript below:

Partial transcript:

It is nice to be back in the mile-high city. I just think it’s absolutely beautiful flying in, you know, you’re over the snow-capped hills, I think you call them mountains, I’m from Alaska. So gorgeous yeah step off the plane. Todd reminds me we’re in Colorado don’t inhale. So the president was here last week too, huh, getting his rocky mountain high on busy week for him. Spinning from one scandal to another scandal must have had some vertigo. The middle east exploding in chaos and this time and the open border crisis no time to visit the border but time to shoot some pool and his whistle and grin real big for icky photo ops that he just really really hates and he raked in big bucks with big parties with fat cats, his term not my term, this in a border state, he was. The president he so disparages these cats in public but in private there’s a whole lotta cuddling and purring and tummy tickling with the one who feeds them.

Although many websites have mockingly wondered if she is drunk or high, we received a tip from a neurological expert that her speech precisely fits the symptoms of a neurological disorder called Wernicke’s Aphasia!!!

What is Wernicke’s Aphasia?

Wernicke’s Aphasia is a speech disorder that occurs when a person has damage to the posterior portion of the left side of the brain. This damage may be the result of a stroke or some kind of damage, such as what might result from accidentally driving a railroad spike through your own skull.

The Aphasia Center website describes the symptoms this way: “[A] person with this type of aphasia may have difficulty understanding what you are saying to him. While he may nod or socially act as though he understands, what he is hearing is often not what you are saying. Fluent speech means that he is speaking in extended sentences, although the content of those sentences may be full of neologisms and paraphasias. A neologism is made up word [and] aparaphasia can be when I mean to say “cook”, but instead I say “sook”, or “look”.”

The Aphasia.com website describes the syndrome like this: “You may have serious comprehension difficulties and be unable to grasp the meaning of spoken words. Yet you may be able to produce fluent, connected speech. What you say, however, is in most cases a series of meaningless words that sound like sentences, but don’t make sense, and you may not even realize that your speech is incorrect.”

These descriptions characterize a large number of Palin’s speeches over the years, but this latest video indicates that she may now be — deliberately? — manifesting the symptoms more strongly.

How does this impact Sarah Palin’s 2016 Presidential Run?

The Republican Party has a long history of trying to increase their appeal to a broader audience, not by actually changing any of their positions on issues, but by simply coming up with people who belong to different “minority” groups in hopes that it will get people to vote for them. Many believe that this was how Sarah Palin was chosen as a Vice Presidential candidate in the first place, although it also explains other Republican political choices as well (“Nine Nine Nine!!!”).

Could Sarah Palin’s speech this past weekend be Sarah Palin positioning herself for her run against Hilary Clinton in 2016?Could Sarah Palin be planning to outflank Hilary Clinton by being not only a woman… but a woman with a neurological disorder???

This could potentially create a very serious problem for Democrats in 2016. After all, if Democrats are faced with a choice between voting for a woman, and voting for a neurologically impaired woman, their bleeding-heart affirmative-action liberal ideology pretty much demands that they vote for the latter, right?

RIGHT????

 

 
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Sin, yelling, and Game of Thrones: a guide for Modern Christians

The modern world has so much sin in it: from same-sex couples who love each other and want to get married, to women wanting equal pay, to shows like Game of Thrones. How are good Christians supposed to deal? Pastor Gregory responds to a letter from one of our viewers, explaining that all of the

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What is a fiscal conservative?

There seems to be a lot of confusion about what the term “fiscal conservative” means these days. We have gathered some images and examples from recent news stories to help clear things up: A fiscal conservative says we can’t afford to improve our schools. And also spends millions of dollars to send people to stand

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Why Rush Limbaugh is never wrong, and will never be sued

Rush Limbaugh likes to tell people that he is right 99.7% of the time. He also isn’t embroiled in continual lawsuits for slander. Since he is known for dramatic and extremely partisan statements, for three hours a day every weekday for more than 20 years, you might wonder how that is possible. Well, my friends,

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Obama says “Fuck You” to all Christians while fellating a Hitler statue

I know what you’re thinking: “Ooooh, that title is so edgy and controversial!” Or:  “Isn’t that title is going a bit too far?” Or even: “I somewhat suspect that the title of this article might not be literally  true!” NONSENSE!  And I will explain why.   We live in the social media age! Nobody really

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Superman will eventually have assless red underwear, because LIBERALS.

Marvel Comics is changing things, and conservatives like Zach Heltzel don’t like change! Zach talks about female Thor, black Captain America, and what we can expect next from Marvel. With liberals so anxious to have every PET GROUP of theirs represented, will we see a gay (or: “even MORE GAY”) Superman? Will the Hulk become

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THREE FACTS that prove corporations matter more than you do

Corporations are not only people, they are GREAT people. They are AWESOME people. They contribute to society in a positive way, unlike poor people and Democrats. Conservatives shouldn’t shy away from this basic fact. It’s a core part of conservative ideology, and there is nothing wrong with it: corporations matter, people who are not corporations….

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Conservative quotes proving that racism is totally over in America

With illegal immigration in the news, a lot of liberals are accusing conservatives of being racist. But as you probably know, racism is over in America. Nobody is really racist any more. We have collected a montage of quotes from prominent conservatives that prove that nobody is racist, racism against blacks is over, and the

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A compassionate, loving Biblical solution to all those dirty illegals

Today’s letter comes from man who is concerned that we have a president who has busted our borders wide open, and let in a flood of illegal immigrants. Dear Pastor Gregory, As a born again faithful believer in Jesus Christ our Lord, I’m worried about the illegal immigration problem. I don’t think we can have

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Five specific GOP predictions about Obamacare: TRUE OR FALSE?

Back before Obamacare was passed, good conservative Republicans made MANY DIRE PREDICTIONS about all of the things that would go wrong with Obamacare if it was made into law. Well, most of Obamacare has now been implemented, so let’s see how accurate these predictions were! Specifically, the Commonwealth Fund has released the results of a

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Michael Savage identifies three reasons to impeach Obama, and we have data to back it up!

Michael Savage is a guy with a radio show. He’s a true-blue conservative. He spent a full three hours on his show yesterday on the question: “Should Obama be impeached?” He came out with a very strong answer of yes, and he gave several very specific reasons why Obama should be impeached. I was impressed.

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Supreme Court: workplace sexual harassment is just freedom of religion

Are successful men being persecuted for their exercise of Freedom of Religion? Zach Heltzel explores some of the unsettling recent events involving the Left’s War On Men. Thanks to the decision of the Supreme Court in Burwell v. Hobby Lobby, we know that companies should be allowed to do whatever they want, regardless of any

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What July 4th means to me: the 2014 edition

Published on July 4, 2014 by in Reports

Ronald Reagan gave a very famous speech at CPAC in 1974  in which he tells a story about the day the constitution was signed.  He gave another variation of the same speech in 1981, in a speech called “What July 4th Means To Me”. This is an excerpt: The myth goes that on July 4,

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SHOCKING: Weird climate change poll suggests that money matters to people.

Published on July 2, 2014 by in Reports

Liberals have been trumpeting a recent poll result that suggests people are willing to pay more for their energy bills in order to fight global warming a.k.a. climate change. “By an almost two-to-one margin, 62 percent to 33 percent, Americans say they would pay more for energy if it would mean a reduction in pollution

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Extremist Democrats reject celebrated icon Cesar Chavez

I am proud to be born and raised in the suburbs of Phoenix, Arizona, a hotbed of American conservatism that is helping to steer the entire nation on the right track. With the most conservative state legislature in the country, we tried to pass a law making it legal to discriminate against gay peo…I mean,

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